A piece of Hard Light: excerpts from Michael Crummey's Hard Light. (Poetry/Poesie).
Steffler, John
Most of what I want him to remember lies among those islands, among the maze of granite rippling north a thousand miles, and what he remembers is all I have a claim to.
'And now to make a start as a boy of very little understanding.' (1876) After a single season jigging cod I gave up on the ocean, boarded a steamship bound for Little Bay Mines where I secured a position picking for copper; kept at it through the winter, a long shadow working effortlessly beside me while my back was shaken crooked by the jabber of pickhead my hands too numb at the end of a shift to properly hold a spoon In June I jacked up and went back to fishing, shipping out with a crew headed to the French Shore, happy just to be on the water after seven months discovering darkness in the mine Salt air like a handful of brine held to the face of an unconscious man coming slowly to his senses 'The price of fish.' (September, 1887) I have had a fair trial on the fishing line now, being 3 summers out from home, 2 summers on the French Shore, 4 down on the Labrador, and three trips this year to the Banks of Newfoundland, and this is what I have learned to be the price of fish Shem Yates and Harry Brown lost with the Abyssinia, making through slack ice 60 miles NE of the Grey Islands when the wind turned and she struck hard on a block, the vessel split like a stick of frozen kindling -- May, 1886 Tom Viven out of Crow Head, his boat running loaded down through heavy seas that opened her up forward, going down just off Kettle Cove and a good trip of fish lost besides -- August, 1884 My last trip to the French Shore, Luke Brumley and Fred Strong sent out to take in a trap set loose in a gale, the rough weather filling their skiff with water when they hauled up the span line, the two men pitched under only a good shout from the Traveller but neither one could swim a stroke -- June, 1882 Show me a map and I'll name you a dead man for every cove between home and Battle Harbour I am twenty four years old, there is no guarantee I will ever see twenty five 'A narrow escape almost but saved.' (1892) Aboard a Scotch boat shipping a cargo of marble and alabaster across the Gulf of Lyons. Three days out we came on a perfect gale, the seas running above the mast heads and the Captain had us clew up the topsails, haul in the jibs and bring down the mainsail to reef it tight. I was running out on the boom to make fast the outer jib when the ship dropped away like a gallows door and came up hard on a swell, chucking me fifteen feet into the air and overboard; I was lost but for falling into the outer jib whips rolled four feet underwater by the gale, like a dip net after capelin. I hung fast to a rope as the ship rolled back, got hold of the martingale whisker and heaved myself in over the bowsprit to see the Captain running about the deck with a life buoy shouting he had lost a man. We had a fine laugh about it afterwards -- when I climbed back aboard, they said my face was as white as the 4 ton blocks of marble we had wedged in the hold. But I don't remember being afraid when I fell, only the certainty of knowing I was about to be drowned a thousand miles from home, and then the jib whip in my hands, the peculiar darkness of discovering there is nothing that is certain. I came out of the water a different man than I had been though I would be hard-pressed to say the difference. The scar of that rope on my palms for weeks after the storm had passed. 'Useful information, the Holy Lands.' (1893) Desert the colour of winter sunlight, a yellow that is almost white, shadowless, constant shift of sand like a tide swell beneath your feet. Hills on the horizon as red as blood. The Commandments carried down Mount Sinai by Moses in sandals, his feet blistered by the heat of God's presence, lettered stone scorched by the sun, his bare hands burning. All of this was once under water -- mountains rose from the parting flood like the Israelites marching out of the Red Sea to walk parched into wilderness, sucking moisture from handfuls of hoar frost. I have spent my life on the ocean, seven years now I have worked on the high seas, my hands blistered by the water's salt, my tongue thick and dry as leather. The desert was familiar to me, I knew something of what it demands of a person, what it can teach. I understood that it is mostly thirst that makes a place holy. 'Boat Building.' (1899) Before the snow settles in have your wood cut and carried to the dock yard where you can work away at her through the winter. Scarf the joints to frame her out, fit the beams, sides and stanchions, then caulk her timber tight with old rags or moss chinked in with maul and chisel. Give her a name before you fit her out with rigging, christen her bow with a prayer. When the spring drives off the ice launch her into the harbour and hope for the best when you let her go. Remember this if you can: a boat on the water belongs to the water first regardless of her name or who it is that names her. 'Distance from Newfoundland. Northernmost grave in the world.' (1913) A cairn of stones tells the story, broken oar and a sledge runner roughed into a cross where the remains of George Porter lie, the end of an expedition to Ellesmereland 1800 miles from St. John's harbour, the vessel found wrecked and nearly forgotten on the Carey Islands. I have travelled 12000 miles to Van Dieman's Land, crossed the line and lost sight of everything I had looked upon, the North Star put out like a pauper when the Southern Cross appeared in the sky; the Water Bear, the Albatross, the South Sea Seal guiding overhead, so many strange things that seemed strangely familiar as if I was visiting an old city I knew well from maps and stories. In Constantinople I stepped into the Dardanelles that drowned Leander swimming for the light of Hero's torch; I walked the streets of Salonica where a seller of purple and fine linens became Europe's first Christian, a convert of shipwrecked-St Paul, the two of them praying together among bolts of cloth, Lydia was the woman's name. George Porter lies under stone only 1800 miles from Newfoundland and almost further than a man could travel - an initialled watch beside the cairn where sailors stumbled upon it, a notebook with the dead man's name, how close he came to being lost forever. What's Lost The Labrador coastline is a spill of islands, salt-shaker tumble of stone, a cartographer's nightmare - on the coastal boat 50 years ago the third mate marked his location after dark by the outline of a headland against the stars, the sweetly acrid smell of bakeapples blowing off a stretch of bog to port or starboard, navigating without map or compass where hidden shoals shadow the islands like the noise of hammers echoed across a valley. The largest are home to harbours and coves, a fringe of clapboard houses threaded by dirt road, grey-fenced cemeteries sinking unevenly into mossy grass. Even those too small to be found on the map once carried a name in someone's mind, a splinter of local history -- a boat wracked up in a gale of wind, the roof-wrecked remains of a stage house hunkered in the lee. Most of what I want him to remember lies among those islands, among the maze of granite rippling north a thousand miles, and what he remembers is all I have a claim to. My father nods toward the coastline, to the bald stone shoals almost as old as light -- as a warning, wanting me to understand that what's forgotten is lost and most of this he cannot even recall forgetting Painting the Islands At first glance the coast of islands is treeless, a monochrome beige or grey, the hills in the distance flayed or worn smooth like a whetstone worked by a knife. Narrow valleys of green emerge from shadow as you sail into them, stands of dwarf spruce in thin soil, their toots tendrilled to stone; white antlers of stone glitter in high crevices, meadows of moss cover the sway-backed headlands clean as a freshly mown lawn. In the brief three months of a northern summer fields of White Heather and Honeysuckle find grace enough to bloom, bushels of blueberries ripen in the wet of August rain. To paint the islands properly you have to see them up close, to know the light that inhabits their darkness -- moments of rust and bronze in the dull granite rock, the Neapolitan swirl of molten lava fissured through the grain of hillsides. Approaching Nain, the islands are bare and burnished black, metallic glint of the afternoon sun caught by long blades of mica imbedded in the surface and for the few minutes it takes to sail beyond them the stones are alive with light. Company Saddle Island, Red Bay, August 19th The island would rather be left alone: arthritic crag of stone, dry tufts of scrub, contrary old man with his back to the world, ignoring the steady drizzle of tourists drawn by a minor stable of heritage sites: Dorset midden harbouring a scatter of bone and chipped stone tools as old as the house of God, the graves of Basque whalers weighted with rows of granite rock like crude buttons on the cold coat of the earth. Visitors stilled by the diminishing heft of those lives, their silence keeping company with other, longer silences. The island, meanwhile, is busy forgetting, the whalers stripped of faces by a thin shroud of acidic soil, their stone firepits fallen in and swallowed by a dark mouth of bramble. Abandoned freighter tilted in the lee, burnished orange with rust, her name eaten from the bow. Last stop, a whaler's lookout stoved in and rotted on a bare rock ledge, the black earth remains of wood and baleen seeded by the wind, a patch of sod now plush as shag carpet underfoot. The shallow impression lodged in moss by the weight of each new arrival erased before the island is left behind.