I'm just so glad that I helped little India beat her cancer ..

KIDS make their own rules. As far as little India Farmer was concerned, she'd dreamed of meeting Fergie for as long as she could remember and nothing was going to spoil the moment the two of them came face to face.

Her mum had tried to give her some advice about how to greet the Duchess of York. Along the lines of, "stand still and wait until you're introduced", and, "call her 'Ma'am' and don't speak until you're spoken to". All of it wasted breath.

As soon as Fergie arrived nine-year-old India forgot all that, leapt into her arms and was lost in a smother of hugs and cuddles. Fergie was clearly overjoyed by the warmth of her welcome. "How lovely to see you at last," the Duchess told the bundle of energy who by now was giving her a smacking kiss. "You look so healthy and well."

The two of them go back a long way. This first meeting, over scones and strawberry jam in a hotel in London's Knightsbridge, had its beginnings five years ago when India, suffering from acute myeloid leukaemia, was in a hospital bed in Leeds, her life slowly ebbing away. By chance the Duchess read a story about her plight as she was flying across the Atlantic with her daughters, Beatrice and Eugenie. "It moved me beyond words," she said. "I looked round and there were Beatrice and Eugenie having a silly squabble about a Barbie doll. I thought, 'What wouldn't India give to be on this plane having a fight about a doll instead of being where she is?' From that moment I was determined to do everything I could."

Fergie was as good as her word. India's only hope of survival was to find a suitable bone marrow donor. The Duchess promptly gave three vials of her own blood to be tested to see if she was a match and whether her own marrow could be used for the transplant.

Sadly this proved negative. But the publicity generated by her action saved India's life. The Anthony Nolan Bone Marrow Trust was swamped with calls. Even though the odds against a match were 80,000- to-one, a donor was found. "There's absolutely no doubt in by mind," India's mum Jo said, "if it wasn't for the Duchess, India wouldn't be alive now."

And how alive she is - a complete joy, a bundle of cheeky fun. When they sat down together to begin their tea, Fergie dipped into a carrier bag and produced the first of several surprise presents. This took the form of a doll with bright skin, a wicked grin...and a mop of bright red hair. "Remind you of anyone?" the Duchess asked. India didn't miss a beat. "You!" she yelled.

"Er, yes, quite right. She is a mini-me. Every penny from her goes to help needy children. She's called Little Red and just like me she's a teeny-weeny bit naughty. You have to promise to love and snuggle her."

Jo broke in: "Isn't she great. She's come at just the right time. India lost her favourite toy not long ago, Squeaky Rabbit."

Fergie smiled at India: "I'm sorry to hear about Squeaky Rabbit. But he did his job. He saw you through hospital. Little Red is the future."

They talked about home and school and pets. Are there any animals at your house, India asked the Duchess. "Apart from myself you mean? Yes I've got a pony, and a black and white spotty dog. He eats so much he's absolutely square."

Every so often another present appeared from the carrier. Then Fergie suggested that India paid a visit to Madame Tussauds the next day. "Are you in there?" India asked. "Yes. I've been re-instated. I was in exile for some time. A man carried me out with my body under one arm and my head under the other. I felt I'd been executed, like Anne Boleyn. But obviously they think I deserve to be put back."

Fergie bent closer to India and whispered conspiratorially in her ear: "If you're interested I hear there's a waxwork there of Brad Pitt, and it's made in such a way that you can pinch his bottom." She grinned at Jo. "Housewives love it apparently."

Then she turned to India again and asked her where she lived. "Oh, Harrogate," Fergie repeated. "Where those nice toffees come from. I have to be so careful though. You know how the saying goes...'A moment on the lips means a year on the hips'."

It was India's perfect day. But now and again you got glimpses of how hard the struggle had been for her. The worst time was after she had an intensive course of chemotherapy in 1996 and was given the all- clear. But a month later the cancer returned. "She was just slipping away from us," Jo recalled. "We knew that without a donor that was it."

OUR little corner of the tea-room fell silent. "It must have been absolute hell," Fergie said. "Your help meant everything to us," Jo told her.

"I'll never forget when the donor was found, you rang up within half-an-hour to say how thrilled you were. It cheered India up more than you'll ever know.

"The day after the transplant she looked at me and said firmly, 'I'm not going to die, Mummy'. Though she was only five years old, I couldn't believe her determination. At that moment I knew she was going to be all right."

How wonderful to see India now, her cheeks glowing, eyes sparkling. In September she will have been clear of cancer for exactly five years - and that in medical terms constitutes a cure. "She's so huggy and snuggly," Fergie told Jo. "My girls are growing up so fast now, I find it hard to get them to hug any more."

There is a personal dimension to all this. Fergie's interest in cancer charities - she is a patron of the Teenage Cancer Trust which builds special departments so youngsters can be treated together rather than on adult wards - is not accidental. "I lost my grandfather to leukaemia, my stepfather to leukaemia, my best friend died of skin cancer and my father died of cancer. So I know what a terrible illness this can be."

Fergie and her father, Major Ron, who died of a heart attack last month after a fight against prostate cancer, were as close as can be, and she misses him terribly.

Despite his privileges, Ron Ferguson was in a strange way classless. "I will tell you what brought this home to me," Fergie said. "When I was at Dad's funeral, a chap called Terry came up to me and said, 'Let me tell you something, your father went to the best school and I went to the worst. But he was my friend'."

His gift to her, she says, her legacy, is her independent spirit. "He stressed the value of being true to yourself. 'It doesn't matter what the world thinks', he'd say, 'as long as you think it's right, that's all that matters'.

"It has got me into trouble because I have sometimes behaved in a way that doesn't exactly correspond with social etiquette. For instance, people find it hard to believe Andrew and I are happily divorced. Dad would say, 'Why not, if that makes you both happy?'

"Dad had a wonderful way with people, especially children. He took them at face value. It didn't matter a jot to him if you were three or 83. He met everyone on their own terms and found great delight in them.

"The one thing he prized above all was honesty and straightforwardness. He was never frightened to speak his mind. For me it has been a double-edged sword, of course. People have been obsessed with my private life, but then again, if I hadn't had such a high profile, I could never have got the publicity to help children like India."

Tea over, there was a delightful moment, just the two of them saying goodbye at the hotel, arms entwined, the little girl and the Duchess who had saved her life. "Thank you for everything," India said. "No, no, no," Fergie told her, "it's all because of you and your spirit".

The Duchess got into her car and wound down the window. "I'll tell you what we'll do next time we meet," she said. "We'll go and see Peter Pan. Apparently there's a 14-year-old boy in it and my girls tell me he's 'pretty fit'. I understand that means good-looking."

Then she was gone. India waved until the car disappeared into the London traffic.

Back in the hotel Jo told me a story about something that happened the day before they left. "There were these boys playing outside our house. India told them that she was on her way to London to meet the Duchess of York. 'Oh yeah,' they said, 'tell us another one'. They couldn't stop laughing. They won't be laughing now."

-IF you would like to help the Teenage Cancer Trust, you can contact them on their website, www.teencancer.org

Additional reporting: ADRIAN TROUGHTON

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