Today's highlights in history Beware that smiling face

By MIKE DIXON

EARTH, 2010 --- Scientists with the SETI Institute (Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence) say that aliens from another planet have invaded the earth. Scientists have named the intruders the "Cerebaloni" because of their appearance.

The beings evolved on their home world to the extent that they appear to be nothing but brains with eyeballs attached. They cannot live in our atmosphere; nevertheless, they have found a way to reach the Earth's surface. They use transporter beams to excavate the seed cavities of certain members of the cucurbit, or gourd, family. Then they beam themselves into the hollowed chambers.

The cavities of these fruit provide the bodiless aliens with moisture and the conditions that they need to exchange gasses with our atmosphere. They are particularly fond of the gourds that we call pumpkins.

The Cerebaloni were first discovered in September when some pumpkin farmers accidentally dropped some ripe fruit on the way to market. "It's not a pretty sight," said one grower interviewed. Apparently, more than one homemaker has been surprised while preparing a jack-o'-lantern for the kids.

A word of warning to trick-or-treaters: The aliens are especially fond of cucurbits with carved faces. The eyeholes let them see out into the world, and they have teeth. Approach with caution. When you see an unlit pumpkin with a big frown on its face, don't put your own face up to it to look inside. If you must investigate, stick a pickle spear into its mouth and see if it comes out in one piece.

Mothers, when you dispose of that old jack-o'-lantern, pick it up by the bottom, and don't lift the lid. The aliens are everywhere. We're talking about a lot of Cerebaloni.

Mike Dixon lives in Topeka.

Send your own remembrances of the past or your thoughts about the future to Celebrate 2000 Essay Contest, The Topeka Capital-Journal, 616 S.E. Jefferson, Topeka, KS, 66607. Essays should be 300 words or less. Be sure to include your name, hometown and phone number.

Spotlight

By BILL BLANKENSHIP

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