Hague's dog days over at last

IT WAS William Hague's last Prime Minister's questions.

And it was all too much for David Blunkett's dog, writes CHARLES REISS.

In eight short minutes, just after three o'clock, the Leader of the Opposition demonstrated the strengths which brought him success inside the Commons and the weakness which meant he never really made it with the voters beyond.

The Tory leader (outgoing) was witty and barbed at Tony Blair's expense, but his material was all insiders' Westminster-speak about who Mr Blair had sacked and the accountability of Government.

Of Tory leaders (incoming) there was no sign. Iain Duncan Smith and Kenneth Clarke had both made themselves scarce.

Tory leaders (failed) however were strewn about the House like carcasses after a particularly nasty foot-and-mouth cull. Michael Ancram lurked on the lower reaches of the front bench. Michael Portillo was farther along, separated from his deadly enemy Ann Widdecombe by Shadow Transport Secretary Archie Norman, a sort of human no man's land. David Davis slumped one row behind.

Mr Hague began well, pointing out he had asked the Prime Minister 1,118 direct questions in four years but received straight answers to hardly any.

From then, though, it was downhill all the way.

Liberal Democrat leader Charles Kennedy sought to pin the Prime Minister over the Tube. Mr Blair flounced and wriggled. A minority of Labour toadies gave him a sort of cheer.

Most sat in sullen silence.

By 3.20pm, with 10 minutes to go, the Home Secretary's hitherto faithful guide dog Lucy slipped her harness and marched out behind the Speaker's chair to freedom.

Alas, for the rest of us, escape was not so easy.

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Copyright 2001
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