wannabe records management optimist (a lesson from Voltaire), The

We records managers are known for our pessimistic point of view. We attend conferences devoted to planning for the worst imaginable contingencies. We participate in workshops on dealing with smoke and water damage. Every morning we look overhead at the pipes in the basement to which our department is relegated and exclaim knowingly, "When those things burst and the records are soggy, we'll remind them of what we said..." We are known for dire predictions such as, "Very few companies without an effective vital records program can survive five years after a major disaster." Our publications contain full-page pictures captioned "This company could be yours" and portraying a distraught executive surrounded by a pile of charred and water-logged paper.

Like the real estate agent specializing in cemetery plots, our careers partially depend upon our employers' believing "it could happen to us." We are prophets of the likelihood of misplacing a document not secured in the central file or of losing a multi-million-dollar lawsuit because of the absence of an adequate records management program. We buy every book and calendar on Murphy's Law, not because we think they are humorous but because we believe in their inevitability.

However, without being ready to commit myself to an institution as a schizophrenic, I must admit that, alongside my usual pessimistic records management self, there lives a Wannabe Optimist. Like any other schizophrenic, I am not always able to repress my other self. One day last week, for example, an event occurred that enabled him to emerge. As the other members of the agency's emergency preparedness team told the staff how concerned they were for employee safety, I had nothing to contribute to the staffs comfort level. "The best I can offer," I said shamefacedly, "is consolation that at least your grandchildren will have a record of what you were working on when the catastrophe occurred."

As I walked away from the meeting in self-imposed solitude, an unrefereed debate between the optimistic and pessimistic aspects of my personality began. What follows is a transcript of that discussion.

Wannabe Optimist: [spiritedly] "Must the records manager be doomed to endlessly repeating Murphy's Law? Must he always be the dour-faced pessimist, the harbinger of devastation? Isn't he in fact missing many wonderful opportunities for achievement based upon optimistic risk-taking because he can only think about what might go wrong? Has he not become a victim of his own gloomy self-fulfilling prophecies? Isn't there a way of introducing the power of positive thinking into records management? If he were really to have the faith of a mustard seed, would he not be able to move mountains? What about Leibnitz's proof that everything is for the best in this best of all possible worlds? What about the little engine who could? Can the records manager not become an optimist and still be a records manager?"

Pessimistic Self: [put on the defensive by Wannabe's insistent manner] "As usual, your arguments sound convincing, but they are just nebulous phrases with little substance. If I gave you control, what would you do in actuality? How would you optimize my procedures?"

PLAN OPTIMISTICALLY

Wannabe Optimist: [unexpectedly rising to the occasion] "The key to becoming an optimistic records manager is to plan with the adage of the self-fulfilling prophecy in mind.

The pessimist believes in failure; therefore, he fails. The optimist believes in success; therefore he succeeds.

"Consequently, since our optimistic plans are self-fulfilling, there is no need for a contingency plan based upon the possibility of things not working out in this best of all possible worlds. A pessimistic contingency planner is like the man who walked to town with his eyes focused only on the road to avoid falling into a pothole. Although he never fell into a pothole, he ended up in the wrong town, because he had not looked where he was going. Contingency plans wreak of creeping pessimism disguised as realism. They serve only to weaken our faith in success. Conversely, the optimist's assumption that negative contingencies are very unlikely enables him to plan effectively how to use resources normally reserved for misfortunes.

"In setting goals, an optimist will develop standards based on extrapolations from abbreviated test work periods, e.g., how many documents can be microfilmed in ten minutes. This approach will enable us to keep our productivity goals from being distorted by gloomy forecasts of fatigue, boredom, and other components of the 20% of non-productive time for which pessimistic plans usually allow. After all, the records manager's new optimism will doubtless inspire at least 125% productivity, a gain which will more than offset 20% of nonproductivity.

"Above all, we must become optimistic about the staffs ability to perform the impossible. If we remember that we will become who we think we are, there is no excuse for not planning to achieve what would be impossible without such absolute confidence. Then, if we believe, the staff will believe. If they believe, they will achieve the goals. This is the lesson of the self-fulfilling prophecy. Just as eliminating contingencies from our plans provides us with the justification for further increasing our goals, total faith that our staff will achieve what we have cajoled them into committing to will save managerial resources. For this faith eliminates our having to check up on their progress towards reaching the goals. Indeed, such monitoring would not only be a waste of time, it would imply a lack of confidence and might cause the staff to doubt themselves."

Pessimistic Self: "I sense we are sliding down your slippery reasoning into a quagmire of logical non sequiturs--especially your arithmetic of optimistic productivity. Moreover, your self-fulfilling prophecy argument could just as easily be used to prove that, if we had enough self-confidence, we could flap our arms and fly to the moon. Besides, how are we going to inspire such believe in our staff? You know that records managers are simply not that charismatic."

WANNABE'S RECIPE FOR INSTILLING THE STAFF WITH OPTIMISM

Wannabe Optimist: "The basis for optimism in a records management staff is biological. With this in mind, schedule your staff's goal-setting sessions early in the morning before the unrelenting barrage of unreasonable demands and groundless complaints from the outside begins to wear them down. Even more importantly, provide an ample supply of strong coffee and donuts--especially the big ones filled with jelly or custard. No matter how tired or jaded they may be, a staff stuffed with coffee and donuts is a staff ready to commit to the most ambitious goals. As the caffeine and sugar flow through their veins, their experience-based resistance to your sanguine projections of future success will dull. Raising the level and tempo of your voice will further add credibility to your enthusiasm."

Pessimistic Self: "But what happens when they become conditioned to pessimism by disappointments in the real world, and what about those who go into hypoglycemic shock when forced to indulge in such a sugar-and-caffeine regimen?"

Wannabe Optimist: "Highly unlikely. However, if evidence of such resistance appears, there are several proven devices available. Remind them of upcoming performance evaluations and the weight given to initiative, positive attitude, and ability to exceed objectives in determining merit pay increases. Describe your goals-no matter how utopian they may be in reality--as something any moron could achieve. Your staff will be too scared and ashamed to question their ability to accomplish what you suggest.

"Another way to sustain the momentum once the staffs caffeine and sugar levels have subsided is to invent ingenious rhymes or limericks that are too clever to be false and that will sustain the mental anesthetization that the grocery-store drugs have brought about. Remember also that inspirational music bypasses critical reason and appeals directly to our emotions. Playing over and over again in the background songs like 'Accentuate the Positive,' 'Climb Every Mountain,' Sunny Side of the Street' and 'High Hopes' will orient the staff at the unconscious level towards a positive outlook. Remind them that they can only achieve the impossible if they attempt the impossible. Institute a 125% Club, and give out gold pins engraved with I GIVE 125% in bold Gothic letters."

Pessimistic Self: [rhetorically] "You really think music and jewelry will enable them to produce more than they are capable of producing?"

Wannabe: [whispering] "Well, the pins don't represent past production so much as hope for the future. Give out these pins to those whom you notice beginning to slip so that they will regain their confidence. Whatever you do, never check to make sure they are on schedule in accomplishing agreed-upon goals. If they think you question their dedication or ability to achieve the goal, they may lose faith."

Wannabe: [returning to his normally buoyant voice] "Finally, an inspirational story can be invaluable. Personal stories are perhaps the most meaningful, but they are also often the least believable. Preschool stories, like The Little Engine Who Could, have the advantage that they were engraved on minds that were not yet influenced by critical rationalism. I have never heard anyone comment on the imprudent engineering irresponsibility of hooking up that undersized engine to such a heavy load. Quite the contrary, we still feel the catch in our chest and the tear in the corner of our eye as we turn the final page for our pre-school children. Your staff will doubtless be similarly inspired."

FAITH IN OTHER DEPARTMENTS

Pessimistic Self: "Aha, your so-called optimism is no program for records management. It is really just a superficial motivational speech appropriate for a raw bunch of door-to-door vacuum-cleaner salesmen."

Wannabe Optimist: "Not at all. It is appropriate to every records management situation. In fact, we must expect not only our staff to succeed, but other departments as well. We must stop complaining that other departments don't see records management as a priority and so won't follow the records policies. If we are true believers and enthusiastic, we'll inspire them to give records management its proper priority. Just as we do not need to monitor our staffs progress or plan for contingencies, we must trust other departments to complete their own inventories and retention schedules accurately and on time. Think of all the time we will save by not having to do physical inventories of all the records ourselves.

"Once we get into the habit of trusting--and the departments realize our trust--it can be expanded. We will trust them to remember to return the materials they checked out, thereby saving many hours of filling out check-out logs and out-cards. We will trust them to fill out transmittal forms correctly and not shortcut procedures, thereby eliminating the need to review the entries. We will trust them not to abuse passwords, thereby saving all the effort and time of issuing new codes and establishing complex security systems. Remember all of our rules are really just to help other departments do a better job. Think of the labor resources we will have saved the organization simply by trusting others to do what is already in their own self-interest to do."

THIS TIME THE COMPUTER SYSTEM WILL REALLY WORK

Pessimistic Self: [Sarcastically] "Now I guess you are even going to tell me to forget my past twenty years of experience and trust that the computer will work as promised the first time."

Wannabe Optimist: [replying without hesitation] "Even though he has been disappointed in the past, the optimistic records manager must be prepared for the time when what has been promised actually occurs. He can only be ready to seize the moment by confidently expecting the computer system to work as specified. Only by making this assumption is he able to make plans based upon the computer's ability to reduce labor and accelerate project completion. Since validation tables and security routines will eliminate error, productivity will improve dramatically from the start. Since we have determined to stay with open systems, all of our computer software and hardware are now mutually compatible. There will be no need to discard previously purchased equipment. The problems of obsolescence and incompatibility have been overcome forever. Finally, because the bandwidth of fiber-optical cable is for all intents and purposes infinite, there is always room for one more will become our motto. If we don't optimistically expect these events, we will not be prepared to take advantage of them when they occur."

Pessimistic Self: "Perhaps. But consider that, if we don't expect some snafus in new system implementation, we will not be prepared to deal with the delays, malfunctions, and deficiencies inherent in any initial system installation. Your perspective is very warped. Next you will be telling me that my vendors are interested in my welfare more than their own."

YOU CAN TRUST YOUR VENDOR

Wannabe Optimist: [suddenly changing his demeanor from revival preacher to studied academician] "No. Actually there is no real distinction between the two interests. Therefore, trusting the vendors is the only logical course of action. We have already discussed the advantages of expecting only the best from our plans, our staffs, other departments, and our computers. If anything, trusting vendors is even more defensible. Even if we find two of them disagreeing with each other, we must not assume that either is necessarily wrong: Their differences may just be a matter of perspective. After all, to be successful sales persons, they must really believe that their own product is truly best. We can safely assume that they will not sell us software we don't really need, a system that is not right for our operation, or hardware that will break down and need replacing. Remember it is to the vendor's interest to keep us satisfied. Our evaluation of his product is his best advertisement. All of this being true, there is no need to waste time checking references, reading the fine print on the warranty, or comparing the invoice against the price quoted. Once again optimism saves time and effort."

IS MY PESSIMISTIC SELF REALLY A CLOSET OPTIMIST?

This time my Pessimistic Self had no reply. It was not that I had begun to really accept Wannabe's arguments, for they did appear ridiculous once presented in such extreme versions. However, I had begun to recognize most of his suggestions and arguments as recommendations that I myself (in less pessimistic moments) had spoken--or acted upon. Thus, I have brought coffee and donuts into a staff meeting secretly hoping to sweeten the staff's response to a "challenging" deadline. Pretending to joke, I have mentioned performance evaluations as we discussed increasing productivity goals. If I have not resorted to marketing techniques as silly as limericks and songs, I have attempted emotion-laced departmental pep talks. Once I switched the radio station to a livelier station in the afternoon to offset the natural urge for a siesta.

Above all--and most dangerously--I have used watered-down versions of Wannabe's "expect the best" argument as an excuse not to check carefully on staff performance, vendor delivery, and computer application bugs. In fact, this "expect-the-best" frame of mind has occasionally led me to act like the Riverboat Gambler of records management. I have dodged a more vigilant review of document capture or filing accuracy by arguing the low probability of error. I have used the "law of diminishing returns" as an excuse to curtail the review of transaction error reports. I have justified a haphazard review of a staff member's performance or a vendor's punch list by recalling the high percentage of times they have "done everything right in the past."

THE CRITIQUE OF EMPIRICAL REASON

More often than not, such escapades of optimistic gambling have resulted in costly failures. Moreover, I doubt that I am the only records manager to have been disappointed in this way. We are very much in the position of Voltaire's protagonist in Candide. Candide's teacher, Pangloss, used convoluted philosophical arguments to convince him that "everything is for the best in this best of all possible worlds." Candide only learned to question this teaching after a series of mishaps that included shipwreck, syphilis, faithless women, loss of fortune, and sickness. Finally, he came to recognize that theories, no matter how appealing, are worthless if not consistently verified by experience.

If not quite so traumatically learned, the records manager's down-to-earth pessimism is equally a product of experience. We didn't develop our pessimism through theory, as Wannabe did his optimism. Records management is a discipline acquired empirically. At one time or another, most of us have learned that Wannabe's "thinking will make it so" philosophy does not work in a non-metaphysical world. Records managers have learned that a little experience will quickly deflate Wannabe and Dr. Pangloss's optimistic, philosophical arguments. Indeed, we have ceased to be surprised when a newly installed system is not operational even six months after being installed. Some of us have learned that too much coffee and donuts can result not only in sugar diabetes, hypoglycemia, and hypertension, but in worker's compensation and indolent lethargy as well. Not a few of us have verified the principle that any system implemented without testing will destroy half our data and all of our credibility.

THE WANNABE OPTIMIST UNMASKED: A LAZY RECORDS MANAGER IN DISGUISE

Records managers differ from Candide in one important respect. Candide's optimism in the face of earthquake, plague, shipwreck, syphilis, etc. was--at least according to Voltaire--the result of the dominance that the silly Dr. Pangloss held over his mind. It is doubtful that we have really been convinced to this extent by Wannabe's equally ridiculous presentation of the same doctrine. Yet if we don't really believe Wannabe's power-of-positive-thinking rhetoric, why do we sometimes mimic it in word and action? Why do we still sometimes slip into our uncritical "positive thinking" when all of our experience teaches us it is just not true? Is it not more plausible that there is another--less philosophically lofty--motive?

Is Wannabe really just a guise for someone else? Who? Let's play detective. If you think about it, the answer is obvious, as Agatha might say. There is only one part of us that stands to gain immeasurably from pseudo-optimism: Laziness. It is laziness that prompts us to substitute absurdly optimistic forecasts and assume:

* That the staff is on schedule with the project, although we wondered from the beginning of they had not overcommitted themselves.

* That the poor quality of an image we happen to retrieve is just a fluke not serious enough to warrant any serious review.

* That even though the contractor is a month behind schedule, he will make up the time at the end without increasing the cost.

* That a system based on compatible PCs and DOS is by definition "open-architecture" that will interface with any other PC/DOS system.

* That there is no need to amend the contract to include the services not specified, since the modifications were understood and will be remembered by all involved.

* That a task will be done, even if we don't follow up.

It is laziness that leads us to neglect the strong empirical evidence for Murphy's dictum that something, sometime will go wrong, and if we are not prepared for it, the results will be disastrous.

SOME MUST WORRY IF OTHERS ARE TO DREAM

Without question, Wannabe made some valid points. Often "blue-skying" is useful even for records managers. We may occasionally miss opportunities by always focusing on potential problems. Indeed, the principal of diminishing returns implies that at some point the pessimist's efforts to identify potential pitfalls will just not be worthwhile. In other words, it does not make sense to dedicate yourself to proving Murphy was right when the cost of detecting errors exceeds the cost of the undetected error itself. Wannabe's orientation also promises a more relaxing and enjoyable work schedule:

* Happily planning successful new programs;

* Stating our case with rhetorical perfection to staff and other departments, without worrying how they will respond;

* Implementing computer systems without having to test them.

Yes, Wannabe's optimistic dreaming could be very appealing--if dreaming was our job. But it isn't really the job of others--strategic planners, for instance--to "blue sky" and to focus upon ethereal possibilities? Aren't we the ones paid to watch out for the potholes, so that others can plan without fear of ending up in a ditch? Indeed, a little thought will reveal that any successful organization requires pessimistic forethought to minimize damage resulting from misfortune, as well as optimistic planning to take advantage of opportunities that result from success. Along with the audit, accounting, and legal departments, records management provides the organization with its necessary "pessimistic consciousness." Together they provide a safety net beneath the organization's trapeze artists who need this security to give them the confidence to take reasonable risks. Being a records manager implies commitment to the necessary, albeit tediously tiresome tasks of reviewing the invoices, testing the new application, scrutinizing the input error report, and sending another memo about the danger of the water pipe dangling precariously over our file cabinets.

TEN RULES FOR THE PESSIMISTIC RECORDS MANAGER

Assuming that you have repressed Wannabe and returned to the work you were hired to do, here are a few guidelines for acceptable pessimistic records management behavior:

1. If you provide the staff with coffee and donuts, make sure it's a reward, not an incentive.

2. Substitute pessimistic arithmetic for Wannabe's optimistic "New Math": A staff in top form produces at most 80% of the time--without subtracting for sickness, vacation, and staff relocation.

3. Never implement new systems (no matter how foolproof they appear) without:

a. A total back-up (stored off-site);

b. "Excessive" testing;

c. Taking time to think of everything that can possibly go wrong and how to respond to it.

4. If it seems too simple and easy to be true, it probably is.

5. Follow up.

a. Assume that the staff over-committed itself.

b. Assume that other departments didn't have the time or didn't understand or didn't give the task the necessary priority. Be prepared to nudge them repeatedly.

6. Don't gamble on any system or project working correctly on its own; save the wild shot for Vegas.

7. Double check the invoice--even of your mother is the vendor.

8. Check the contents of the transfer box against the transmittal; don't be surprised if you find an opened package of empty file folders, last year's Sports Illustrated or an old pair of shoes. (I did.)

9. Check out the requested document properly, even if the borrower needs only "to look at it for a moment."

10. Be a persistent pessimist. Try to imagine every potential mistake (whether data entry, filing, outcards, etc). Then devise some way to test if it actually occurred--and don't become dangerously optimistic because you didn't at first find anything wrong. Remember eventually Murphy will always be correct some of the time. It is your job to find that time before serious damage results.

Copyright Association of Records Managers Administrators Inc. Jan 1994
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