I'm corny, corny, corny, corny

He's a boorish Freemason who despises the kind of liberal lefty that persists in commissioning his shows at the BBC. Jim Davidson may be cack, but he keeps coming back Jim Davidson was recently out-ed as a member of a white, all-male club whose rituals seem arcane and impenetrable to outsiders. They employ a special handshake which involves a firm grip, usually combined with an elaborate elbow squeeze using the left hand. If you want a good price on that extension, this is a man who could put you in touch with a builder at his local golf club.

Mostly they wear sober suits but on special occasions can be seen in fancy dress. Chunky gold rings are another sure sign. Tradition dictates that they gather once a week, usually on Saturday evenings, in specially decorated halls, where well-worn incantations are recited before an enthusiastic congregation. Yes, BBC light entertainment is a dark and strange place.

As word filtered out of Davidson's behind-the-scenes influence as a light entertainer earlier this year, a BBC source was quoted saying: "Years ago everybody accused the BBC of being riddled with them and a lot of effort has been made to counter that image. Jim has not been a great help."

Only joking. The quote actually referred to Davidson's announcement in April that he was going to be sworn in as a Worshipful Master of the Freemasons. But as the comedian returns to host a new BBC variety show - make that an "all-star mix of laughter and music, featuring chart-topping bands and the latest comedy talent" - it's hard not to see a parallel between the anachronistic worlds of masonry and light entertainment.

After axing Noel's House Party, one might have thought that the BBC was indeed trying to counter that dated variety image. But Jim Davidson Presents suggests that the spirit of music hall is alive and high-kicking.

The first show features a guest appearance by the worshipful master of corny one-liners, Bob Monkhouse, which if nothing else demonstrates how the light entertaining brotherhood scratches the backs of its own. Whether they tickle ribs is another matter. But what's interesting about this new show is that it is screened after the watershed on Friday night, rather than in the more traditional Saturday teatime slot. This puts it up against the alternative comedy ghettoes on BBC2 and Channel 4, where irony rules.

Davidson, a troop-entertaining, trouser-leg-rolling, Tory party- fundraising, topless model-dating comic, is emphatically not ironic. One of his pet hates is Ben Elton, whom he accuses of running down Britain. "Let's talk about someone else's country and have a good laugh at those b*stards," said Davidson in a recent interview in which he also confessed to being Scottish. "Let's talk about the accusations of racism in comedy. The BBC is frightened to death of offending anyone who's dark."

Presumably he means "black". But the liberals he so despises at the Beeb still can't seem to help themselves from hiring him. He hosted Big Break, which was built around snooker player John Virgo's limited ability to pot the colours in a humorous manner. Davidson also injected a boorish masculinity into the Generation Game, which contrasted with the campy turns of Brucie and Larry Grayson. Jim would all but pat the bums of female contestants.

The question is how such a charmless man has managed to stay ahead as one of TV's top comics, despite stage shows that are about as politically incorrect as you'll find this side of a Bernard Manning gig.

"If it causes offence to liberal people and makes them say I'm a racist, sexist, mysogynistic pig, I don't care," he has said. While Davidson minds his language on telly, his audience knows that that a string of expletives is on the tip of his tongue. In short, he has the common touch.

Davidson is one of a shrinking pool of TV entertainers who can still unite a mass audience, and the BBC knows it. Post-modern irony is one thing, but when the chips are down it's still a filthy foreigner joke that gets the big laughs every time.

Copyright 2000
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