Creative writing devices - Young Writer's Workshop

"Let the rain kiss you..." This unforgettable line from Langston Hughes's "April Rain Song" demonstrates why writers rely on devices such as personification. Figures of speech, alliteration, onomatopoeia, and other word play help writers create energy and atmosphere in their writing. As your students learn about and begin to notice these devices in the material they read, you'll begin to see the same techniques appearing in their writing - writing that is more focused, expressive, and alive.

Introducing Rhetorical Devices

Rhetorical devices enliven students' writing so their ideas become more exciting to read," says Kent Alexander, writer-in-residence for Teachers and Writers Collaborative and contributing author to Sing the Sun Up: Creative Writing Ideas from African-American Literature (teachers & Writers, 1998). Here, Alexander shares a favorite mini-lesson to introduce figures of speech and other writing devices to your students.

1 On the chalkboard print a simple sentence, devoid of even adjectives or adverbs, such as "The boy went to the store."

2 Ask children to contribute words to modify each noun. Then have them brainstorm adjectives and adverbs that suggest sensory details, such as sights, sounds, smells, and textures. Children may also substitute specific nouns for the generic boy and store, and a more powerful verb for went. Record all suggestions and substitutions alongside the original sentence.

3 Invite students to read the words in any combination to create new versions of the original sentence: "The green, seasick boy hobbled to the yellow supermarket."

4 Which version - the original or the revised - do children like better? Why?

5 Repeat this activity to help children explore and develop any rhetorical device you are covering. For example, focusing on alliteration, one revised sentence might read, "The starving boy strolled swiftly to the supermarket."

Teaching with the Reproducibles

Once down a foxhole lived a family of fox kits. There was Frank, there was Floyd, there were Freddy and Flo. Fosdyke made five.

Introduce alliteration with Four Famished Foxes and Fosdyke (HarperCollins, 1995), Pamela Duncan Edwards's tale of four foxes who attempt to feast on a farmyard of fowl and their brother who prefers flan, fiddleheads, and other gourmet delights. The reproducibles (after Technology Buyer's Guide pullout) give children a chance to try out the author's technique themselves.

Follow up by letting children write their own alliterative picture books. How many objects with names that start with the repeating consonant sound can they hide in the illustrations? (Edwards challenges children to find at least 60 objects beginning with the letter f.) As part of the revision process, have children read aloud their stories. Do they like the way the words sound?

PICTURE BOOKS: A Terrific Teaching Tool

Students of all ages enjoy picture books - and they make a great tool for teaching elements of writing. In a ten-minute mini-lesson, you can read a book cover to cover, letting children see how the author uses the devices covered in this workshop in the context of a whole story. With limited text, children can more easily pick up on, for example, alliterative lines, metaphors, and so on. Use a book such as Four Famished Foxes and Fosdyke (see reproducibles, after the Technology Buyer's Guide pullout) to introduce a rhetorical device, then let children explore stories on their own or in teams to notice additional examples.

Alliteration: The Key to Happenin' Headlines

Where do you look for alliteration? Donna Clovis, an ESL/language arts teacher with the Riverdale School District in Riverdale, New Jersey, finds it in the news. "We don't usually think of newspaper writing as being beautifully written," says Donna. But she and her students discovered that it is. Her students begin by looking for articles that use alliteration in the leads. They then use alliteration to write their own leads for school news stories, polishing the stories on the computer and then using a large type size to make the alliterative lines stand out. Students display their stories on a bulletin board covered with newspaper.

Alliteration can be used to achieve different moods, for example:

* to impart energy: "...honks its horn to hurry us" (from "Sleepy Schoolbus" by X. J. Kennedy in Roll Along: Poems on Wheels, selected by Myra Cohn Livingston; McElderry, 1993)

* to create a sense of fluidity: "A seal sniffs softly as he recognizes you..." (from Time of Wonder by Robert McCloskey; Viking, 1957)

Write & Solve Metaphor Riddles

I look like a thistly you, but I grow taller and smaller in a day. What am I? Your shadow

Turn your classroom into a game show to learn more about metaphor and personification. Students will write What Am I? riddles describing objects by comparing them with other things or by writing about them as though they were living things. Here are some tips.

* Brainstorm nouns, such as night, cat, wind, book, bug. Be creative. Words like smile, shadow, and blizzard might make fun riddles.

* Choose one object and think of something to compare it with.

* Try describing the object as a living thing, too. Which method works best?

* Refine your riddle, making changes to create a strong image of the object without naming it.

Let students pose their finished riddles to classmates - a game-show format could add some fun and excitement. Or use the riddles to create an interactive display. Have students glue or tape flaps on paper, then write the riddle on the outside and the answer underneath.

Describe the Slime

Donna Clovis offers writing workshops during recess. How does she get third graders to trade in playtime for writing? Slime! This personification workshop puts a spin on the old writing-about-rocks trick.

Use the recipe below to mix up a batch of slime. After children have had a chance to get to know their slime, let them develop and write about characters based on it. Ask questions to guide them: What words describe the qualities of your slime? How does it move? What kind of character would slime be? What kind of a voice would slime have?

Slime is just one of the objects Donna uses to introduce personification. "The objects need to have texture - something students can feel," she says. String foam and shaving cream are other favorites.

Slime

I'm mysterious creeping, crawling listening carefully to every conversation creeping and crawling and oozing down the white walls of your kitchen to the floor.

- by Marcos, Grade 3

Make Your Own Slime

2 parts white glue 1 part liquid fabric starch food coloring (optional) 1. Add food coloring to glue and stir. 2. Add starch and mix thoroughly. 3. Grab a handful. Slimy!

Whir, Whistle, Whoosh

What are the sounds of everyday life? Invite children to explore onomatopoeia at home by spending some time in the kitchen. What are the sounds of a toaster, microwave, mixer, tea kettle, can opener, and coffee maker? What other sounds are part of a kitchen? For example, they might hear pans clattering, water whooshing, and popcorn popping. Ask children to write words that sound like the noises they hear. Share them in class, making lists of the many words that create sensory images of busy kitchens.

Adapted from Prose and Poetry for Young Readers and Writers: Grades 4, 5, 6 by Cornelius Novelli (The L. W. Singer Co./Random House, Inc., 1964) by permission of the author.

Teaching with the Poster

Use the poster (after Technology Buyer's Guide) to show students how some of their favorite authors use writing devices to spice up their work. Then try the following activities to help them create their own literary sparks.

* Use Doug Florian's poem "The Mosquitoes" to explore metaphor. Ask: How is a mosquito bite like "take-out food"?

* Explore onomatopoeia with the excerpt from Julius Lester's retelling of the Uncle Remus stories. Ask: Why do you think words like ZOOM are in capital letters?

* Susan B. Anthony's speech shows students how various devices help make any kind of writing more effective. Read the excerpt aloud. Ask: What words catch your ear? Notice how the repetition of sounds (in battle/ballot, peaceably/persistently) adds emphasis to the writer's words.

A Dictionary of Devices

Use these definitions and examples of devices to teach a series of ten-minute mini-lessons.

* Ask students what they notice about the words in the example. Guide them to recognize the device you are introducing.

* Try making word substitutions to learn more. For example, as you explore consonance, compare "wrapped her arms around" with "put her arms around." Which does a better job of establishing a mood?

* Display a piece of chart paper labeled with each device. Record a definition in children's words, then let them add samples as they find them.

SIMILE: uses like or as to     "Flat as a pancake/Flat as a
compare two things             crepe/Flounders are flat/As a prairie
                               in shape."  from In the swim by
                               Douglas Florian (Harcourt Brace,
                               1997)

METAPHOR: an implied com-      "Out of the factory chimney
parison that doesn't use       tall/Great back animals like to
like or as                     craw..." from "Smoke Animals," in
                               Story Teller Poems by Rowena Bennett
                               (Holt, Rinehart)

PERSONIFICATION: giving an     "...little gray footprints followed
object or idea human           us" from Owl Moon by Jane Yolen
qualities                       (Philomel, 1987)

ALLITERATION: repetition of    "The dreadful dragon lay stretched on
beginning consonant sounds     the sunny side of a great hill..."
                               from Saint George and the Dragon by
                               Margaret Hodges (Little, Brown, 1984)

ONOMATOPOEIA: words that       "It started with a puddle of banana
sound like their meaning,      pudding...SPLAT! SPLATTER! SPOOSH!
such as slush, buzz, and zip   Everyone slid smack into Mrs.
                               Toppel..." from Officer Buckle and
                               Gloria by Peggy Rathman (Putnam,
                               1995)

CONSONANCE: repeating conso-   "Annamarie smiled and wrapped her
nant sounds in words, not      arms around her little sister in the
necessarily beginning sounds   dark." from Number the Stars by Lois
                               Lowry (Houghton Mifflin, 1989)

ASSONANCE: repetition of       "...A spatter a scatter a wet cat a
vowel sounds in words          clatter/A spatter a rumble outside."
                               from "Weather" in Catch a Little
                               Rhyme by Eve Merriam.

JOAN NOVELLI, a former teacher, is a contributing editor of Instructor.

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