Book reviews -- I. A. M. A Common Sense Guide to Coping with Anger by Melvin L. Fein

I.A.M.* A Common Sense Guide to Coping with Anger, By Melvin L. Fein. Westport, CT: Praeger, 1993. 356 pp. $49.95.

This book presented a number of pleasant and rewarding surprises. Upon first receiving the book, I thought, "Oh no! Another new-age, self-actualizing book promising redemption in a few, relatively inexpensive steps." But Fein's book is not a slick, step-by-step path to happiness. It is a thoughtful, well-written, and realistic treatment of anger as a useful, necessary, and purposeful emotion.

The second surprise came when I realized it was taking an inordinate amount of time to read the book for review. Fein draws on examples and situations that cause the reader to reflect on what has been read and how it applies to one's own practice and personal experience.

Anger is a misunderstood and much feared emotion. All of us have either been the recipient or perpetrator of the harmful, hurtful, and destructive aspects of uncontrolled anger. As Fein articulates in the first chapter, we have many beliefs, attitudes, and biases about this emotion. Fein captures our ambivalence toward anger. Even experiences with anger that are not destructive leave us feeling uncomfortable. Anger can turn into rage that leads to dire social and personal consequences. Fein agrees that we probably will never "enjoy" the experience of anger but believes at we can learn to control it and focus it to achieve useful goals in our lives.

Fein begins his discussion of anger by focusing on its problematic aspects for the individual and interpersonal relationships in the workplace and in society. Following this presentation, he states that anger is a necessary emotion serving specific purposes, that it is not merely an intrapsychic issue but has a social context. Anger protects us from being used and abused, helps us define interpersonal boundaries, and helps us achieve goals. He notes that many current approaches to dealing with anger attempt to eradicate the experience of anger. Fein believes that such objectives are unrealistic and impossible. His goal is to help individuals learn how to manage and use anger so that the experience does not devolve into atavistic, primitive, and destructive rage.

Fein presents a step-by-step process by which an individual can come to terms with and learn to manage anger. The steps are (1) assuring safety, (2) developing incremental tolerance, (3) evaluating goals and methods, (4) relinquishing impossible goals, and (5) using the emotion to achieve goals. Each of these stages is connected and integrated with the others. Fein is methodical and realistic in his appraisals and suggestions and leaves little to conjecture.

Unlike authors of some "self-help" books, Fein never gives the impression that mastery of his technique will inevitably lead one to bliss. One of the weaknesses of the self-actualization movement is the notion that all one has to do is identify (think) about that which is desired, find the proper method to attain it, and the desire will automatically be realized. Fein states that an individual may not get what he or she desires and that some goals are unattainable.

Fein brings a much needed sociological perspective to a phenomenon that has been overpsychologized. As a clinical social worker, I appreciate the importance of situating individual behavior in its social context. Fein is familiar with the various psychological approaches to mastering anger, and analysis of each position is fair and useful. He notes the strengths and discusses weaknesses of various approaches. For example, in discussing rational-emotive therapy, Fein recognizes the usefulness of Ellis's techniques while noting that it is unrealistic to believe that thinking controls expression of all emotion or that thought can or should control all of our emotional responses.

Fein underscores how psychology can fragment the human experience by overemphasizing the individual. For example, Chorver (1985) states that psychology in American culture reflects the values of individualism to the exclusion of the social context and that specialization within the discipline reflects capitalist division of labor more than it does human experience.

Fein is familiar with psychotherapeutic techniques and concepts. For example, in his discussion of catharsis, Fein states it isn't simply about venting for the sake of vencing, but that its purpose is to build incremental tolerance of what is perceived as intolerable. Finally, he applies his discussion of anger in individuals to societal issues, for example, the rage that occurs within African American communities.

One weakness of the book is the insufficient attention to the fact that some individuals experience mood disorders-an affective illness that sometimes requires medical intervention. It is not clear how these stages for managing anger can contend with a biological disorder.

Anger is ubiquitous, and contending with it is a universal concern that one must deal with on a professional and personal level. I recommend Fein's book to students, clients, and colleagues.

Copyright Family Service America Sep 1995
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