Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles. . - tools for navigating parenthood - book review

Mary Sheedy Kurcinka 2000; 318 pp. $13. HarperCollins

This is a great book to read before you have kids. Kurcinka throws us a rope and liberates us from an all-too-common parental ledge: being stuck between "winning" and "losing" with children. She unlocks the hidden undercurrents that produce fights and offers alternative routes she has gleaned from twenty years of working with families. Temperaments of children and parents play a crucial role within families, and Kurcinka explains how to make the most of these unique constellations. Empathy and understanding, not sympathy and control, are shown as the Winners in unlocking battles. These tools can help create an optimistic family atmosphere, where struggles may still erupt but not as often and not as fiercely. --TD

"If you are an introvert or a more factual person yourself, and your feeling child's venting is exhausting you, you can let her know your limitations and encourage her to find other listeners besides you. Remember, too, that not every emotion needs a solution; it may simply need to be expressed.

"This style of discipline is called "emotional coaching," and the latest research on human brain development tells us that enhancing your child's emotional intelligence is more important to his success in life than is his IQ.

COPYRIGHT 2002 Point Foundation
COPYRIGHT 2002 Gale Group