Praying like children

When we do, we can grow closer to God

Jesus tells us that if we expect to enter the kingdom of heaven, we must change and become like children (Matthew 18:3). When it comes to personal prayer, grown-ups can imitate several compelling characteristics of children.

Helpless and humble. Children don't confuse themselves with God for an instant. They know they have little control over anything. Helpless, they place themselves in God's hands.

This humble attitude doesn't come as naturally to adults, who cling to the illusion that we control our circumstances. Entering into prayer, we can stop and recognize God's greatness as contrasted with human limits, making a transition to a state of childlike helplessness before God, leaving behind our perceived competencies. We might begin praying like this:

God, I run around from day to day trying to be competent and in control. Right now I put all that aside. I come before you as weak and helpless. It is you who are great, not me....

Heartfelt and honest. Children make no attempt to hide their thoughts and feelings from God. They are natural and unpretentious as they connect with God in prayer. They are matter-of-fact, speaking simply what is in their hearts. Adults are less comfortable and transparent, as evidenced by our often-stilted prayer language and the quantity of our words. We're so accustomed to being careful in our speech-not wanting to offend or be misunderstood-that we speak similarly with God. This caution isn't necessary, as God knows our innermost feelings. We might pray this way:

You know, God, that I sit here with so many different things on my mind, with a whole range of feelings. I give you who I am right now, right here. I feel worried at this moment Lord ....

Human and hopeful. Children aren't afraid to ask. Their numerous prayer requests tend to be a straightforward telling of need and expression of a belief that God can and will provide. Even when children don't get what they ask for, they keep asking. That doesn't mean they don't wonder about prayer that seems unanswered, about unfairness and suffering. But unlike adults, children seem unashamed of such questioning.

While praying in hope takes a childlike trust of placing ourselves in God's loving hands, having our requests "turned down" takes a child's willingness to accept what she doesn't understand and an adult's recognition that God's ways are not ours. We might pray:

God, although I don't always understand your answers, I know you hear me and encourage me to make my requests known to you. So I come to you now, telling you my needs and wants and asking for your help ....

Children are constantly changing, with bodies and minds expanding in exciting new directions. Our physical growth may be over. But as we communicate in childlike prayer, our spirits will continue to develop in relationship to an ever-loving God who cares for us as precious children.

Zurheide, a writer living in Edmond, Okla., is the co-author with her husband, Jeffrey R. Zurheide, of In Their Own Way: Accepting Your Children for Who They Are (Augsburg Books, 2000; www.augsburgbooks.com).

Copyright Evangelical Lutheran Church in America Mar 2003
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