Manners matter at sea - Cruise Views

A cruise is a vacation. Inherent in this concept is freedom from daily commitments, obligatory schedules, mandatory events, and places you have to appear at appointed times. All of this may be true, but a cruise also carries with it a sense of shipboard etiquette--good manners, really--where you extend to your shipmates common courtesies you hope or expect they will extend to you. Such as:

Get to the dining room on time. Nowadays, many ships offer "open seating" or alternative dining restaurants where you may dine (within a generous time frame) whenever you please and sit with whomever you wish. If, however, you are dining in the traditional style--that is, at either a first or second seating at specified times, it behooves you to appear at your table--time. Your tablemates will not look kindly on your lax appearance--20 minutes late--as they sit there studying entrees for the fifth time, sipping water, fidgeting, kvetching, starving, and wondering if/when you plan to make an appearance. Your serving staff will appreciate you punctuality as well: remember, they are on a timetable with other jobs to do after your group has finished dining. And if you have alternate plans for dinner, politely notify your tablemates the evening beforehand.

Don't sit down front if you plan to leave a show/performance before it is over. It is a cruise-industry axiom that the diners who rush out to secure a table or seat in the very front row of the theater are the ones most apt to: 1) fall asleep and snore during the performance; 2) talk loudly: and 3) walk out before the show is over. If you feel tired after dinner and think you might not make it through the show, or if you sense that the performers might not be your artistic cup of tea (after all, not everyone loves illusionists, acrobats, or ever rock & roll), sit farther back toward the rear of the theater. Otherwise, your hasty departure--from a seat down front--is a significant distraction to other members of the audience. And as someone who respects and admires performers, may I note that your early, and very, visible, departure call certainly be construed as critical of the show--and rude.

Be on time for activities and events. Aboard a ship, we are all on holiday, carefree and utterly absolved from attending any mandatory activity (with the exception, of course, of the lifeboat drill). However, after you have perused the daily shipboard calendar of events, decide which you plan to attend and then make an effort to arrive a the designated meeting place at the appoint ed time. Lecturers, aerobics instructors, personal trainers, chefs, shore-excursion managers, and a host of other shipboard personnel all have commitments of their own, and they are obliged to start (and finish) each event according to the schedule. Straggler are a distraction--and in arriving late, you may really deprive yourself of the full value of the experience you're seeking.

Complain only to someone who can do something about it. We have all sailed, at one time or another, with congenital or chronic complainers--those types who are consistently displeased, negative, disparaging, and simultaneously, anxious to share their grievances with anyone within the sound of their voices. If you are unhappy with the service food, itinerary, tendering operation, shore excursion, or the lack of Bosc pears in your daily fruit basket for heaven's sake tell someone who can do something about it. Depending on the nature of the problem, locate the cruise director, director of hotel operations, chief housekeeper, shore-excursion manager, or maitre d'hotel, but please, please, spare the rest of us.

Adhere to shipboard dress codes. I know, I know, once onboard you are not compelled to dress as you would at a business conference or al work. Logically, you regard the cruise as an opportunity to kick back and drop out. Fine, we're delighted to enable you in your pursuit of the carefree life. You will notice, however, that shipboard documents (brochures. daily calendars, etc.) carefully identify dress codes for each night onboard. "Casual" does not mean that you may show up in the dining room in a tank top, cut-off shorts, and flip-flops. Though the definition of "casual," "informal," and "formal" might vary a bit from ship to ship, you may depend on the cruise line to specify dress standards and codes for every night you are onboard. If you choose to conjure up your own couture, you might wish to opt for an alternative dining venue where other dress codes (if existent at all) are more in keeping with the costumes you have created. And please, if the dress for the evening is "formal" (on most ships that suggests tuxedo or dark suit for the men; cocktail dress, etc. for women), stay in the prescribed dress for the duration of the evening. Lately, some cruisers have determined that a suit is like prison garb and that "inmates" must de-robe as soon as possible after dinner. I'm in my tux and you have changed into blue jeans and a t-shirt and, frankly. I'm a little envious, but decidedly more annoyed.

Wait your turn. In case you have not heard, "megaships" nowadays can accommodate 2,000-3,000 passengers, so there are bound to be lines. You will find that there are others who have chosen to sail with you the moment you arrive for embarkation formalities; so have your documents ready, get in the right line, and be patient. Similarly, you are likely to encounter lines for the buffet, al the shore-excursion desk, for tenders to go ashore, and again at debarkation. You will find that, on most ships, the staff is well accustomed to handling crowds and is skilled at moving passengers with dispatch and courtesy. Don't line jump, bristle at delays, or try to "pull rank" because you happen to have a cabin with a balcony on a high deck. We're all in the same boat.

Have a great cruise--just don't jettison your good manners at the gangway.

COPYRIGHT 2003 World Publishing, Co. (Illinois)
COPYRIGHT 2003 Gale Group